4.4.2013 - 80,4kg " - "
 Tonight I slept very well, easy falling asleep, peacfull night and easy wake up with a sun. I think I dreamt something, but cant recall anything. And at the morning straight for mornign exercise!
 I) Today I started with Sun Salutation for 10 minutes. I wanted to find golden middle way betwean speed and precisness, so I started with very precise repetitions and increased speed when I felt safe to not break precisness. I have to add, that it was fantastic streching and I enjoyed it very much.
 Next 10 minutes I spend giving some love to my belly muscles. Starting with 4 rounds of TM core WO, I felt it very rich, but made all 4 rounds with honors and even did almost 5th (could not do 1leg/1arm part in 5th round anymore). Then I continued with various holdings and with exercises focusing on side muscles.
 3rd block I spend with various whole-body exercises, starting with 20x fair burpees (its CRAZY exercise, man, so dificult in lots of repetitions, Im allways flushed like toiled...) then some back-crawling, mountain climbers, leg exercises, shadowboxing and at the end "rope" stretching. It was enough O.o
 Last about 15 minutes I spend dancing, focusing on craziness and unleasing patterns in dancing, how something like taht could possibly go bad?! I end up going realy crazy on Enter Shikari - ZZZONKED , this song have power to get me in realy crazy energy where I feel like tornadoruning through everything with maniacal laughter and primal joy, love that energy <3 At the end I enjoyed very much to dance on Venetian Snares - Szerenscétlen , I swear I will make a video with dancing on this song, its so immensly beatifull, fullfilling, joyfull and creative to dance on this, I love it to the bones.
 II) early afternoon I went with a friend climbing again (finaly!). It was all different then last time, we did very different routes and we spend more time there. for my body it was also very different. I could work more with my balance and hara. I also tryed and made one, for me, very difficult route with 2 overhangs. Before I tryed I was like "no fucking way I could make it!" but I just tryed, believing my friend, that he know whats fine. He was also giving me hints and I made it! Only in last part (which was basicaly only vertical) I had to use some foult hangs, because I already used most of my powers. So far I did not gave up single route, I better finish it with help then give up. But I believe in future I will have to learn this as well - to give up when its simply over my head (and not because of lazyness or low courage). This route took most of my powers so for rest of the session I was doing more easy routes, but it was fun to do easy routes very fast (for me on my level, my friend is flying up these routes :P ). My body reached its limits today, today not only my forearms hurted, but whole body... and I mean WHOLE body, only sex didnt hurted and hairs were ok as well... so almost whole body, alright... geez.
 III) At the evening I went to tantra course. I was seriously considering to not go this time, ebcause of my body, but mind wasnt so numb and I wont probadly go again for some time so I went there. We started Anahata chakra (4th chakra) so it wasnt so bad. I just could not relax, meditate or anything, my body was all so painfull, that I could not find the way to relax it. Or as I realized later - my mind was so loud telling me that I should not do it and rest that I could not relax my mind and therafore relax my body as well. In relaxed body I think is possible to sustain any pain, or even very strong pains. In tense body even small pains feels bad.

 What a day today. I leanred a lot today about the veil which my mind puts over me, I dont like that its so strong. ITs all just illusion of being tired, not having energym, having pains, just freaking illusion. But why its created, I feel my body is able to endure anything, heal instantly, instantly regenerate, do anything. Why I have so strong patterns in my mind which tells me "its not possible". Whats the purpuse of this mechanism. Its not objectivity, I simply CAN do safely and healthy much much more then my mind let me. This king (mind) has to be dethroned.