11.6.2013 - 79,6kg " + " yeah, have to start thinking again about overreacting on weight drop, I feel today extremely fat, even I ate no sweets, I ate a bit of salty goodies, have to stop this crap soon.
 I slept well and hard today, again dont remember any dreams. But I remembered one dream from past nights which slipped out of me: I was in some office or something and inhabitant of that office gave me computer with some office software to do something. And I did without problems, even I never saw that software before. She was very surprised and I explained her that I have lots of exp. with office software and this one is user friendly enough so it went naturally easy. She was very happy about it. But I dont remember anything else from that dream. In the morning straight for morning exercise.
 I) Starting today with 10 minutes of Sun Salutation, first prolonged holds in position from 1 to 6 second in each position and then dynamic reps, I quite enjoyed it to be honest, Im more flexible then ever.
 Then 10 minutes of Kata1, also made me very happy today, I tried how much reps on each side I can do in dynamic way and I end up on 14 (maybe 15, I lost count in one point....) and I had no respiration problems or some major week moments, it felt good and it wasnt like easy or something, mind you - I was sweping real good in the end, but point was, that I could function good even it was so hard.
 Then 10 minutes of ABS exercises, I did Barstarz set today, it was crazy, I feel like I was too easy on my ABS in last days, or I dont know why it makes me such troubles. I have to focus more on these exarcises, I mean, focus while I exercise them, to be precise, focused, present, make it rich. But today it was indeed rich alright.
 Last about 13 minutes I was dancing. Today it was truly awesome, its been some time since I enjoyed dancing so much, in one moment I felt something like energetic orgasm from dancing, it was well... ecstatic indeed, amazing, beautiful, powerful, ufff... great :)
 II) Then, after trip to do some official stuff hurray for yoga! I did again today 2 hour setup (its really exactly 2 hours long, but I didnt tried to fit it so exactly :D ). What can i say, for me yoga become something like ritual, very sacred ritual. I dont even know how it happened, nobody ever told me that its sacred or anything, I just have this feeling while doing yoga. From first warm up Sun Salutations to last moments of Shawasana. Every moment is like a pearl on the thread of time and all just for me.  I dont want to focus on my body and present moment because "I should" during yoga, I want to do it, because it gives me sooooo much. That feeling of my body, those feeling of energy flows in me. All spectrum of feelings, fears, pleasant moments, answers on my questions in life, all coming from focused execution of yoga. More I relax, more is coming, more I abandon what people say what "I should" in this or that asana, more is coming, more I let myself being led by this sacred energy into poses, more is coming. I feel like my whole being is being disolved and reconstructed while doing yoga.
 Today I went very deep into ardha-vajrasana and fears I felt in last time were gone. I went more into Bhujangasana and I could handle that overhelming feeling in my heart and did not need to stop before time limit. I felt completely new feelings during Badrasana, my body formed itself into new position. I feel I need to work more on my second chakra, this level of my being is way out of balance, I feel it very precisely, in thoughts coming, but in my life as well. Just thinking what asana I will use, I was thinking about double-sided Sukhasana .

 Today, my process from yesterday continued. I fel deeper into feelings of acceptance and I discovered that for me is acceptance connected to love. I can love somebody in moment I accept all oh him or her, in that moment I dont spend anymore my focus on this sorting/judging nonsence and can just feel that person and feel... love. I feel that this is way to love everybody. Im definitely not there yet I still have lots to precess but my mind is telling me that in the moment I can see and accept everything in myself, I dont anymore need to protect myself by sorting/judging others and all I will see is others in all they are. I think this whats happening to me right now is strongly conencted into this process with fears from last days, because I had lots of fears and desires in me to embrace and accept. I discovered lots of things I wasnt happy about, but what the hell - its me, who else then me should accept myself then me. Im not that nice guy I tried to be in past, Im also hard and non-compromise, selfish, guy with borders and wishes in life. Im everything.